BOOKS I’VE PRETENDED TO HAVE READ

Why read the book when I can just watch the movie and stare at Leonardo DiCaprio for two hours?

As I wrapped up 2024 and attempted to hit my reading goal—a whopping 8 books—many so-called "classics" still sat on my want-to-read list.

I could offer an explanation for why my reading goal was so low, like how I’m secretly a slow reader or how I was juggling school and working full-time for more than half the year, blah blah blah. But the truth is, I just didn’t feel like reading more than that last year, and I realistically knew I wouldn’t. Yeah, okay, I guess I gave you an explanation after all.

In fact, I only finished six books and gave up halfway through November.

I started All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr this past summer, got through 150 pages, and then promptly put it down—probably never to return to it. I can definitely tell it’s gut-wrenching—I mean, I cried multiple times in the first part of the book—and maybe that’s why I didn’t finish it. Honestly, last year had too much going on already to take on an emotionally taxing book like that.

Still on my reading list years after it was assigned to me in high school: Catch-22 by Joseph Heller. I probably SparkNoted it to get through assignments, and I love to say "That’s a Catch-22" whenever it feels right—even though I have no clue if it actually applies, because I never read the book.

The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald? Please. Why read the book when I can just watch the movie and stare at Leonardo DiCaprio for two hours?

Now, for the book I heard about a thousand times last year—The Nightingale by Kristin Hannah. Honestly, the sheer size of it kept me away. Plus, I had a gut feeling it wouldn’t live up to the hype. When someone told me, "It’s a slow start, but halfway through it gets good and the ending is great," I was like... no thanks. I want instant entertainment, please.

Any Colleen Hoover book—three of them are currently gathering dust on my shelf. I should probably donate them to Goodwill soon. I know they're all romance novels, and a movie of It Ends With Us was made—one with plenty of Hollywood tea that I definitely did a deep dive into—but honestly, the books just aren't my vibe right now.

But hey, if you didn’t read all this, I’ll keep letting you believe I have, in fact, read each of these books.